The importance of lifelong love

Age UK is offering tips and advice on how to forge new relationships in later life -whether a friendship or romance.

Top tips on how to find love and friendship in later life

• Be ready to embark on a new relationship. Give yourself time to process your feelings from a previous relationship before beginning a new one.
• Take up a new hobby or sign up for local interest classes in your area. One in five over 65s met their new partner through a shared hobby.
• Try online dating. There are a number of sites designed especially for the over-50s to help you meet new people.
• Enjoy meeting new people. Don’t put pressure on yourself to meet the right person immediately.

People aged 65+ have spoken out about the importance of different types of relationships as we grow older, highlighting the value of companionship – romantic or platonic – in later life. A new online poll* for Age UK reveals that one in eight (12%) people aged 65 and over is currently seeking a new relationship and 62% believe it is important to have a romantic partner as they grow older.

But as well as an eye for romance, the survey shows the importance of enduring friendship. More than half (54%)of those polled say they have a best friend, with two thirds (66%) of these having been best friends for more than 20 years – bringing a literal meaning to the phrase ‘friends forever’.

The poll has been commissioned to coincide with Age UK’s Spread the Warmth campaign, which aims to keep older people across the country warm and well in winter, preventing isolation and helping people in later life to meet new people and try new activities.

Yet despite 59% considering romance to be as important as friendship, over a third (35%) think they are too old to join the dating game again, worrying about rejection and what other people will think.

Similarly, eight in 10 (83%) say the value they place on friendships increases with age but nearly half (48%) find it more difficult to make friends as the years pass.

The top reasons those in later life are keen to find love are:

• Wanting someone special to share life with.
• Wanting someone who can mentally stimulate them.
• Wanting friendly physical contact.
• Wanting someone to ease feelings of loneliness.

Despite a longing to build new relationships, many of those polled find the prospect of dating daunting, with nearly a quarter (23%) concerned about how their children will react.

However, the findings show that one in six (17%) over-65s would try dating websites. The role of friends and family is also vital in helping older people to find love and companionship in later years, with nearly half (48%) relying on those who know them best to set them up.

Commenting on the survey, Lucy Harmer, Head of Information and Advice at Age UK, said: "This research shows that love and friendship continue to play an important role in our lives at all ages. Whatever life stage we’re at, how we spend our free time and who we spend it with can have a huge impact on happiness and wellbeing.

"We know there’s an appetite for making new friends and expanding social networks. A big part of Age UK’s Spread the Warmth campaign is bringing people together to tackle loneliness and isolation in later life by meeting new people with shared interests. Whether it’s cookery classes, Nordic walking, gardening or learning to get online, Age UK’s advice line and website offer information to help people keep fit and healthy and make the most of that all-important leisure time."