OPINION: Election pledge: The Honesty Party

Reporter: John Hardcastle
Date online: 06 March 2012

“The promise given was a necessity of the past. The word broken is a necessity of the present.” Niccolo Machiavelli

The month after next, the local elections will be upon us once again and I am minded to stand as a candidate. I have had a good look round at the local parties but to be honest, none of them really appeal to me so I thought I’d form my own.

I think that in Rochdale we really are due for a change. I know that they all say that but I really mean it. Like many, I don’t think that Rochdale has been particularly well-served by politicians of any hue over the past few decades so I’ve come up with something very different. I’m calling it The Honesty Party and here is my manifesto.

Over the next few weeks, you will probably see me on your doorsteps or receive one of my fliers. After that, I faithfully swear that you will see or hear neither hide nor hair of me for at least another three years.

Rather than make a lot of false promises that you and I know I have no intention of keeping, I will not insult your intelligence and will keep these pledges to a minimum. 

• I pledge to put the people of Rochdale first as long as this does not interfere with any in-party wrangling.
• I will be totally honest with you at all times unless it is in any way inconvenient for me to do so.
• I will make myself available to my constituents any time that I feel that it is reasonable for me to do so.
• Without fear or favour, I will not vote for any policies unless I feel that it is in my interest to do so.
• I will regularly attend all meetings required of me unless it clashes with my social calendar or my television viewing.
• If I decide to change party before my term of tenure is up, I swear faithfully not to submit myself for re-election.
• I pledge that at all times I will never let any sense of honour interfere with my role as a councillor.
• I promise to faithfully accept and act upon the advice of paid council officers at all times and in all circumstances.
• I pledge to draw my councillors’ allowance regularly and in the fullest measure.
• I will never let my complete lack of vision interfere with my council duties.
• I will do my utmost to ensure that my photograph appears in the media as often as possible.
• I promise at all times during my tenure to try live somewhere within the M62 corridor.
• I will answer all letters and emails whenever I can find the time and energy to do so.
• I pledge to ignore any or all of my pre-election promises in the line with current expediency. 

There you are. You may not agree with all my points or even like them but if you vote for me and it all goes belly-up, at least you won’t have any grounds for complaint. 

I believe that this gives me a distinct advantage over my opponents.